Wednesday, October 28, 2009
HAVIN' A BALL WITH CHARLES & PAUL
YOUR FAVORITE SPORTS REPORTERS ARE BACK TO WEIGH IN ON THE WORLD SERIES
CHARLES- Well, Paul, it's time for the Fall Classic.
PAUL- You mean the clothing optional Hot Tub Party at Jim Nabor's house?
CHARLES- Oh, Oh, no.....not that Fall Classic, that's in November. I'm talkin about the World Series.
PAUL- Of Poker?
CHARLES- Baseball, you little fop. We're sports reporters, or did you forget that little piece of information?
PAUL- Whoa, slow down there big fella. Who exactly are you referring to when you say "Little Fop"?
CHARLES- I think you know who? Just zip it and save it for later. Our loyal readers want us to break down the World Series, not have one of our infamous cat fights.
PAUL- You're right Chuck, too much drama, why don't you give us some of that CNR baseball insight.
CHARLES- Now you're acting rationally. Let's talk about America's favorite past time, shall we.
PAUL- You mean sleeping with your neighbors and then blogging about it, changing all the names.
CHARLES- No, America's other favorite past time. Baseball. We have quite a match up in this World Series.
PAUL- Why do they call it the World Series when only teams from America and some pathetic loser from Canada get to play for it.
CHARLES- Because that's how its done. That's how its always been. And that's how it will always be. Listen sister, don't go getting all philosophical on me, just give us your predictions and make it quick. I have a Toga Party at Nathan Lane's condo to go to tonight. I have an elegant satin sheet that will be the hit of the party.
PAUL- Whatever, Chuck. I think the Phillies will repeat as champs. That Ryan Howard is a whole lotta man. Way too much man for the Yankees to handle.
CHARLES- Poor, dear Paul. So naive. So clueless. If you want to talk about a man, a real M-A-N, then the conversation begins and ends with Alex Rodriguez. His full glistening lips, his frosted highlights, his ever so subtle use of rougue and mascara. That my dear Paul is a real man. Your Ryan Howard is a neanderthal compared to A-Rod. Oh, Oh, and boy can he sock that ball.
PAUL- Puh-leeze Chuck, you gush about him as if he were LeBron James.
CHARLES- Blasphemy!! LeBron is in a league all by himself. Let's keep that chocolate God out of this shall we, and stick to the World Series. As you have guessed I am picking the Yankees to sweep them.
PAUL- Is that so? Would you care to make a friendly wager Chuckles?
CHARLES- I don't condone gambling, but what did you have in mind?
PAUL- How about the loser has to give Chuck Norris a bikini wax.
PAUL- Yeah, you're right that is more like the winner's prize.
CHARLES- How about the loser has to clean Rosie O'Donnell's bathroom.
PAUL- Oh dear God!! That is repulsive, but alright, we're on.
CHARLES- OK, let's shake on it.
PAUL- OK, Chuck, you can let go now. You do know that you're supposed to shake HANDS when you say that right?
CHARLES- OH, OH hands have so many germs, I'm not a fan of shaking hands.
PAUL- Alright, stay tuned loyal readers, and may the best man win.