"My intellect has taken a step backward since discovering The Daily Drivel" - Albert Einstein
" When I read it I begin to hate my fellow man. I want to hit something"- Mohandas Gandhi
"A complete abomination. We all weep at its very existence"- Abraham Lincoln
"I wouldn't begin my day without it. I've learned so much." - Lindsay Lohan

Friday, November 7, 2008

Barack Obama Admits Running For President Was Just A Joke Gone Too Far

Chicago- President elect Barack Obama has finally admitted to the media that his run for the presidency was just a joke, and that he is no way going to accept the oath of office.
"It actually started over 4 years ago when an old college buddy of mine dared me to make a speech at the last Democratic National Convention in 2004. He dared me to make an"over the top" sort of motivational type speech to see what would happen. Well, they ate it up, and we kind of had to up the ante. He bet me that I wouldn’t have the nerve to run for president. Well, guess what, I took that bet and look where we’re at today. I didn’t think that I had a shot in hell of winning, but I’m a competitive guy who can’t say no to a bet."
Obama, who is set to be sworn in as the 44th president in American history on Jan.20th, is laughing about the whole situation.
"Oh, come on, let’s all lighten up a bit shall we. I can’t believe no one saw through this well orchestrated ruse, not even Michelle (Barack’s wife). Boy, what a poker face I have. I guess I could have a nice career on the professional poker tournament when this is all over."
When told that he has an obligation to the American people who turned out in record number to vote for him, he smiled and said, "Who are we kidding? I was barely a senator. I’ve been in the Senate for four years, two of which have been spent doing this fake campaign. A joke is a joke, but it’s gone on a little too long."
The congress has called an emergency meeting for 4:00 today to decide what should be done about this unprecedented situation.
"Listen, I’m not saying I won’t run for president in the future, but I’m not close to being ready now. For now, I just want to finish my term as senator, and most importantly, collect on that bet from my buddy, which if I’m not mistaken was a shipment of Omaha Steaks and a case of Rolling Rock. That’s what I’m looking forward to. Have you ever had one of those steaks? Wow, they melt right in your mouth." DD


Stevie G.B. said...

oh my goodness. what a revealing article you found. I actually voted for McCain and still glad I did. I wll back Barack becasue I am a patriot who loves his country, but gee wizz...this article is kind of scary.
good stuff

I am also from Holbrook.

Stevie G.B. said...

oh wait a minute....it's a joke? I knew that...